This life is so horrible because of my grandfather dying and my grandmother because we have to go to his house and clean it out and it is hard to not say "mom can I call pawpaw and see if we can go down there tonight" I have been getting used to doing that but now when I want to go down there it is hard to not want to pick up the phone to call him and now every time I go down to his house to clean it out i cry because he was my father and that is what my mom said and in his obituary she put down that I was his daughter and when I read that I started crying because now my dad is gone and my mom is gone but now at least I have someone to live with